Competitive Behaviour

A couple of nights ago some things I had been mulling over for some time all came together. A group of people who have done their NLP training with Pegasus NLP Trainings www.nlp-now.co.uk now meet in Bournemouth every month to share ideas, progress and to practice what we have learnt. This time we explored the use of the TOTE technique, a tool for eliciting the strategies that people use in their lives. We focussed this time on ‘What do you do well in your life?’ and I did ‘competition’.

I know a lot about competition. I have played sports all my life, and won two World Championships, 15 European and National Championships as well as finishing 7th at the Olympics in 1984. I’ve also lost a lot – one of the truths about sailing is that it teaches you to cope with losing as well as winning. I know that the rewards of competing aren’t always finishing first – doing the best you can is often (but not always) as good. I ‘do’ competition well – I’m an expert at it.

In sport we often start work with an athlete by identifying strengths and weaknesses, and one of the patterns I have identified is that huge strengths in some situations are often massive weaknesses in others. This holds true for me about competition. Sometimes I end up competing against people in wholly inappropriate situations.

I have now gained a real insight into the issue. I understand far more about why I and others use competitive behaviour outside the forum of competitive events, and how, if selectively applied, it can be put to good use, but also not-so-good use. Now I recognise what triggers this response so that from here on, I can create that little bit of space in both myself and others I work with to judge whether the situation requires a competitive reaction or not.

I do enjoy these insights into the why’s, wherefore’s and when’s of life!