Advice vs. coaching

I often get asked ‘what is Life Coaching? The answer – ‘coaching on any issue in life’. The variety is endless. I have coached people through change of life directions, relationship break-ups, weight loss programmes, phobias, careers choices, grief, work situations and a host of others.

What do people get from Life Coaching rather than advice from friends and family? I find that advice is usually given by starting ‘Well…… If I was you I’d…….and this sums up it up for me. Someone giving advice does it from their experience of life, and they are giving you what their reaction would be if they were standing in your shoes. While getting another point of view often helps, it doesn’t always. One client said to me recently ‘Long standing friends keep telling me what to do, but they aren’t me, and what they tell me isn’t right for me right now.’

My job is to establish where my client wants to go, and helping them set a realistic plan to get there. Then, when checking progress along the way, either praising or re-setting the immediate goals to something more appropriate. I provide questions that stretch and challenge old patterns of thinking and assumptions.

A set of six sessions will last between six weeks and 3-4 months, and can be face-to-face or on the telephone. Its all about providing a structure for development that allows time for new patterns of behaviour to establish. Its very different from ‘Giving Advice’.